This Poem was Submitted By: Kenneth R. Patton On Date: 2008-11-18 11:33:29 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Overlooked

The Pink Elephant sat cramped in the corner Slouched down Head scraping the ceiling He’d been wedged  there Stuck for decades   no one admitting Wearily dozing off he dreamed of when the children were young and he was just small But they grew and so did he Though he did not graduate No one took his photo He just grew and waited, still ignored Slouching against a bookcase he sighed, resenting the knowledge He had become a monster

Copyright © November 2008 Kenneth R. Patton


This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2008-12-05 16:55:02
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
I am sure there is a double meaning to the pink elephant for as a child he usually brought a smile to our face and perhaps a touch of joy to our hearts. Yet, he is also referred to perhaps as a monster when we grow up and our situations change. Still, your pen has presented a good reference to both the good and the bad. Just remember he was not always a monster and he can become a friend again.......just my take on it all. God has blessed you in so many ways.......Claire


This Poem was Critiqued By: Duane J Jackson On Date: 2008-11-27 22:01:11
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.80000
Hi Kenneth, This poem is a reflective one. Indeed, childhood slips away no sooner than it arrives...the Pink Elephant's playmates (kids) have outgrown the toy in spirit and though it too has aged..it is still essentially a toy- caged in the reality of its uselessness. I like the paralell between the ageing child and the ageing elephant. And while it is bound to bring backhappy memories of play to the now grown kids who cast it a glance, it cannot bring back the reality of the moment and make it happen all over...literally. Duane.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Rene L Bennett On Date: 2008-11-25 06:41:35
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Hi Kenneth, This is different than what you usually write. At first I was imagining a real elephant locked in a zoo but the more I read, I took this as to be an out of place child. I may be wrong in my thinking but that is how I read it! Rene'
This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2008-11-20 17:07:40
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Kenneth, Oh my a monster! I believe he was like a fixture. Always seen but never acknowledged. Appreciated for being there, a strength of sorts. But if he didn't want notice, he became unnoticeable. at any time he could have shown more and won others over. But for some reason he didn't care enough to show himself. As one matures the view changes and until he dies it will not be too late. Sharing ideas, sharing yourself, sharing highs and lows is your gift to another. Start gifting the others. You'll all be the richer. Boo! dellena
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