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This Poem was Submitted By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2009-07-18 17:48:56 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Watermelon

Liquid sunshine One of the few In summertime Picked prime off the vine Seeded or not indeed! They roll and spin In the race for place Upon your table mmmmmâ€¦â€¦..

This Poem was Critiqued By: Lisa Ann Bauer On Date: 2009-08-12 23:38:52
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
I like this. Eating watermelon right now. The only thing missing here for me was color?

This Poem was Critiqued By: James C. Horak On Date: 2009-08-07 21:47:31
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
An enjoyable lark and hope you've had some help loading up those overgrown goards. JCH

This Poem was Critiqued By: Terry A On Date: 2009-07-29 15:32:42
Critiquer Rating During Critique: Unknown
Hi Dellena, This poem would be a very cute sign on the gate of a watermelon farm. I'd like to see poetry everywhere and it could be. Now, if you do one about macademia nuts, I'd say we have lunch! Terry

This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2009-07-27 10:08:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
As long as they're seedless; lol, I love it too;; on occasion and have realized the health benefits of eating it - You've topped descriptive of this fruit - it does shine in the sunlight - and roll, I've never picked one, just apples and strawberries - Have you ever been shopping and someone grabs one to put in the cart and then "Splat", "Clean up in isle 4", booms overhead? Nice write; good spirit enhances it. Blessings, Deni

This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas H. Smihula On Date: 2009-07-20 10:16:10
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Dellena, I assume grapes off the vine is what we are discussing here. Each generation looks at them differently, my grandchildren look to them as sweet snacks, my children as something healthy, and the older ones a form of refreshment. Just some thoughts. Thanks, Thomas

This Poem was Critiqued By: Duane J Jackson On Date: 2009-07-18 21:45:29
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Dellena, I'm not a fan of the fruit but know of many family members and friends who just relish it. Nice introduction to watermemlon in your opening line - 'liquid sunshine'....you certainly seem to be celebrating summer. What topped this poem with a cherry is this line - 'they roll and spin in the race for place...'...I was able to picture this and enjoy what I saw. Very animated indeed ! I would suggest getting rid of the 'mmmmmmm'...it kind of trivialises things...though I know it is your intention to tell us how much you love it. The fact that you wrote about it and did well at that, is proof enough. Pretty show month on tpl...isn't it? Duane.

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