Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

This Poem was Submitted By: Christina Morrow On Date: 2009-09-05 20:46:10 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!

Click Here To add this poem to your "Voting Possibilities" list!

breaks my heart

Are you listening to me? 'Cause I'm not listening anymore. I realized that when you left, Your love was already out the door. So don't come back here, and be one of those men. Who takes my heart, and breaks my heart, and asks for it back again.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2009-09-21 00:21:11
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Christina, I have found in my life writing poetry of my emotions is so helpful to heal. It also is a means to know yourself. It is eye opening at times to feel the hurt or anger. It all helps. This poem is so valuable for self expression. I feel your broken heart. You are afraid h could repeat his action, you are very vulnerable at this moment. Hope you find your way, Sincerely Dellena

This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2009-09-10 08:48:41
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.66667
A wonderful stance as a woman, who needs to vent; and show independence from someone who obviously doesn't have the sense to appreciate what they had. Relationships are work, but people tend to forget the others feelings when acting out with words, and actions that show clearly what their intent is. You've written this with clear understanding of the circumstance involved. You're saying "Go away", because I don't need this pain, that you want to bring into my life. At some point in time we learn to value ourselves more than we do those who can't/won't love us unconditionally. Reminds me of an old post of mine; called Memory Lane - Nice, stand tall, realize your worth and look to the future with a huge smile on your face. blessings, Deni

This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Andrew Hislop On Date: 2009-09-07 20:23:27
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dear Christina This is tender and beautiful, heart-felt and painfully honest. Lovely. Best wishes Mark

This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2009-09-07 19:59:10
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Very powerful stand you have taken and rightly so....you have captured my attention with the opening line and the way your words carry it through brings so many images along with the fact you have stopped listening and rightly so.....I am sorry someone you loved and trusted took your heart and broke it ....what amazes me is the fact he wants it back to most likely hurt once more...Put that pretty smile of yours on that pretty face and let them wonder....looking forward to more of your work. God Bless, Claire

This Poem was Critiqued By: Duane J Jackson On Date: 2009-09-06 14:51:58
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Hi Christina, Welcome to TPL. This piece is very strong in terms emotional content. I can feel the searing pain of having been betrayed - I've been in that position myself and know how difficult it is to deal with. Poetry is a perfect outlet to vent. I would suggest, that in your next step of revision, you would look for an image that would 'show' your reader, rather than 'tell' him or her. The image would need to be fresh. That to me would be the first step in taking this to its next level. Good to have you here. Duane.

Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

Click HERE to return to ThePoeticLink.com Database Page!