This Poem was Submitted By: Mark Andrew Hislop On Date: 2009-09-11 19:43:36 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!

Click Here To add this poem to your "Voting Possibilities" list!


The Arrow

An arrow came for me today some forty years in flight. It knocked once, asked if it could stay and tendered me its freight. My room was bare, I'd no spare bed or victuals to offer. 'One-feathered birds,' the arrow said, 'we both were born to suffer. 'We trade in blood and though it's rare our storerooms are replete, once in the knowing archer's care we're emissaries of fate.' 'None die by me,' I tart replied, 'How can we be the same?' 'Because - this cannot be denied - the bosom is our home. 'We're just a word,' the arrow said, that can't be paraphrased. We have, once by the crossbow sped, already been erased.'

Copyright © September 2009 Mark Andrew Hislop


This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2009-10-03 18:58:23
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.95455
Wow, you've contributed so many good poems this month - this one captures the soul; it's more than a poem, there's a moral to this story; and it stands out in the readers mind. Very, very good - It reminds me of Aesop, a fable - and needs to be put elsewhere than just here. Fantastic-abulous is all I can say; God blessed you Mark, with talent - now take it and fly like your bird.....share it with the world. Blessings, Deni


This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Steven Scheffer On Date: 2009-09-11 22:49:29
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
MAH, This will be the one I vote for. But I ain't telling you where. :) I said the other had "publication" written all over it. And you know I do not necessarily consider that a virtue. The arrow/crossbow analogy is superb. As is the original idea of the arrow arriving at your door. And poems as complete entities communicate an intangible essence, a being . . . and this one does that. The poem has the most "presence" of any posted this month. You know me, I like "presence" and "atmosphere." JCH has one for depth, like a well, another put together with great precision, and Duane has one as sharp as a stiletto . . . but this one has "presence." What to do? You'll find out. But I suspect that you'll post something soon even better than this 'cause . . . I suspect the last few drops of dirty oil have been drained, and now you're starting to purr a bit, real smooth like. MSS
Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

Click HERE to return to ThePoeticLink.com Database Page!