To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
Click Here To add this poem to your "Voting Possibilities" list!
See At First Sight Spring shines a vast growth of green paled simplicity illuminate round Striking tinted tips of live bouquets lustrous scents bestow new beginnings Glance away then back again expect essentials missed with first sight Yellow in unique patterns blending to purple edges a tint shade white flower - one of kind sinks deep in pots One of an only kind like you all there is because nothing exists exactly the same Exactly exaggerates reality in all aspects beyond each season or reason in life differences take reign over precise Chosen angels can bridge apart take flight and shine original with wings unlike Guiding all to witness radiance upon seeing with first sight |
Additional Notes:
Rewrite of a poem I've posted before called Blur of Rapture - I took consideration of the comments for improvement and this will stay as is - Hopefully it reads better, and the content shows I'm working on nature to write about - leaving statements and personal life on hold.
This Poem was Critiqued By: James C. Horak On Date: 2010-02-01 22:05:40
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.94872
Yes, and a better poem. It has the magical indistinctness to which I've alluded often enough, though
you break with it a little in the line, "all there is because nothing/exists exactly the same". Better:
all there because nothing/exists the same. Be a master of understatement as a poet and NEVER over
modify. I would prefer you remove "all" from your poetic vocabulary almost entirely.
The phrase, "striking tinted tips...." is poetically illiterative; the subtle rhyme of "life" with "precise"
in the sixth stanza is delicious and the poem stikes the imagination well throughout.
JCH