This Poem was Submitted By: cheyenne smyth On Date: 2011-02-15 16:10:44 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
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Sun or Shade When spring is nigh and winter’s cold is done
I’ll climb to mountain’s crest or ford a stream
And sing my runes to thee my only one
If nightingales fly skyward as I dream
Then shall I find your odes when night doth fall?
I’ll wend my weary way where’ere thee go
And should I lose my north when sparrows call
From hills so high or oceans deep I’ll know
The moon will rise above the ruby lips
Of earth and leaping stars begin to peep
Thou might return from sailing phantom-ships
And listen close to vows we swore to keep
My love for thee abides in sun or shade
With colored hues of light or eve’s brocade
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Copyright © February 2011 cheyenne smyth
This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2011-03-06 16:22:32
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Wonderful!
Beats me why it isn't up there?
You are soooooooooo delightful to read.
dellena
This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2011-02-28 15:47:41
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.75000
This is one of your best poems Cheyenne, and while I'm here to comment on it, you should know I critiqued your other poem as well and somehow lost it in cyberspace. I want you to know that I did read it and found it quite enchanting -
but this, is breathtaking from beginning to end. Love the use of proper English language because it adds so much more appeal to each verse, that is structured in a beautiful format - an angelic tone, and last but not least a very calming post that is soothing to read.
This is my #1 choice for February,
Brava honey,
I love it,
blessings,
Deni
This Poem was Critiqued By: David Keesey On Date: 2011-02-24 13:31:50
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.16667
A lovely sonnet. I especially like the following lines:
I’ll wend my weary way where’ere thee go
and
The moon will rise above the ruby lips
The sonnet is one of my favorite structures. It has an aura of self knowledge in the form that can bring out the best or worst in a poet. You have succeeded here.
Kindest regards.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Mandie J Overocker On Date: 2011-02-19 21:20:28
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.66667
cheyenne,
Another accomplished piece of work from you here. I like how this flows and the beautiful story it tells. Your rhymes are spot on. This is a beautiful sonnet - true to form and function. Well done! This is one i have enjoyed reading over and over and will print out to have nearby as a reminder of the love my hubby and I share. Thank you.
Mandie
This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2011-02-15 20:10:24
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Cheyenne, the ocean, stars and love- eternal as the subject, are the objects that drive them.
That love “abides in sun or shade†tells more than all the other images that might be stirred. A paraphrase of “through good and bad timesâ€. That also is echoed in the line “wend my weary wayâ€, it is mutual, at least at times.
To await the sailor, is to love the motion of the ocean, and that sun hued horizon.
It is truly your “if nightingales fly skyward as I dreamâ€.
A passionate and conflicted piece.
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