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Soft velvety fur - I love how it feels! (and more when he purrs)- with socks on his heels and white painted toes, a v-shaped white vest from tip of his nose on down to his chest. Heâ€™s otherwise wrapped black from head to rear. Lovingly he napped, so warm and so dear curled up in my lap. In his big green eyes I do love to gaze it is like he tries to never be fazed. On his white belly how I love to place, ever so slowly and nuzzle my face. Then holding him near cozy and cuddling, purr-box in full gear as we are snuggling. And as Iâ€™m sleeping, at my feet he lies; spends the night keeping an eye for my cries. Protecting me through the long lonely nights, reminds me whatâ€™s true when my eyes seek light. A love with no terms he willingly gives, and then reaffirms the great life we live.
./\__/\ /[o][o]\ \.\__/./ My attempt at a text cat...enjoy! .\/\/\/ ..\__/
This Poem was Critiqued By: David Keesey On Date: 2011-03-01 23:30:54
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.31579
A cute work on a kitty. Your style is easy to read and to the point. I would like to see you rely less on "and" for your junctions. Perhaps use more adjectives or adverbs instead. As the "and" doesn't work in this line, "ever so slowly and nuzzle my face." I suggest you work "curled up in my lap" into another line just to keep the meter and rhyme scheme consistent. Keep the same verb tense in "reminds me whatâ€™s true when my eyes seek light." I do question the last line as my cat doesn't quite have the same knack for unconditional love as does Tuxedo, but then again mine is like an old man.
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