This Poem was Submitted By: Mandie J Overocker On Date: 2011-08-18 22:54:34 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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From Within

I’m here, I’m here I hear many screams ring in my ear I’m here, I’m here then why can’t you see we are so near     but there’s a divide between me and them deep down inside there’s a divide that silences to cover and hide    when the emptiness fills up my being then I regress the emptiness pouring out parts of me, more or less    then I hear, I hear their emergent pleas so loud and clear I hear, I hear need to listen with more than my ear

Copyright © August 2011 Mandie J Overocker

This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2011-08-29 15:58:24
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
There is a "defined" message in this poem Mandie. An awakening from the dark and the need to hear more than what your ears are hearing/or have heard in the past. It def is on the darker side but with hope at the ending which makes it stand out. Very nice rhyme, you have a knack for rhyme that is impressive. blessings, Deni

This Poem was Critiqued By: cheyenne smyth On Date: 2011-08-29 00:59:29
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Mandie, There is something about this poem that is so compelling. You have made excellent word choices to express yourself and I love the dark theme and the form you used. Very effective and evocative. Well done. Best wishes, cheyenne
This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas H. Smihula On Date: 2011-08-19 14:12:30
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Like the style here and it might go along with music...thanks for sharing.
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