This Poem was Submitted By: Joanne M Uppendahl On Date: 2011-10-16 22:12:03 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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If My Body Were an Orchestra

What music would it play? Maybe on blue days, it’d riff cool jazz,  or divide up organs into quintets: Miles Davis’s solo tongue, and Ella’s   warm throat warbling "Someone to Watch Over Me"  tuxedo-covered elbows scissoring   Schubert’s "Death and The Maiden", spine extemporizing a xylophone rendition  of  Saint-Saëns' "Danse Macabre." How about Satchmo’s trumpet for a nose,  YoYo Ma’s cello for a belly? Might my breasts intone motets  from Poulenc’s Song of Solomon; my womb invoke Orff’s O Fortuna,  with irony and kettle drums?  Glenn Gould and I may play conjoined,  felted fingers flying over Bach’s  "Well-tempered Clavier."  Since if’s the wanting word:  If my body were an orchestra, it would choose  Leonard Cohen’s "Hallelujah" as my grand finale. 

Copyright © October 2011 Joanne M Uppendahl

This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2011-10-29 18:11:22
Critiquer Rating During Critique: Unknown
Joanne, It sounds like life is looking good for you if you can sing about it. Hallelujah! I love Leonard Cohen. Music is the sound of universal love. How could we exist without it? We are music itself. The celebration of existence. Nice hearing from you always. Enjoy your work! Dellena

This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Morales On Date: 2011-10-21 22:56:19
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2011-10-21 10:00:26
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Lady, let me first say; I am glad I have a deep musical taste and knowledge. For the most part I can savor the whole of your body through the melodic texture of your verbage. (I did have to listen to “O Fortuna”, only to find out I already knew the piece, just not the name!). On the surface this piece is a simple symphonie d'affaires, but for those lending their ears to the sensual sounds, it becomes invitation à diner. That is where I am, after several close readings. It is easy in the first stanza seeing the writer, dans le corps, doing the jazz jitterbug or humpty dance- it is a wonderful, imaginative image. It is also an image that is immediately upstaged by the breakdown of the melody- that is Miles Davis tongue (yum) Ella’s throat (yes) Sachmo and Schubert (wow) and yet it is the walk down the spine Dans Macabre style that stylistically sets the scene. I have never taken to a piece, or written a piece such as this. O Fortuna for the womb (or associated appurtenances) is a brilliant move. Unfortunately I was unfamiliar with Song of Solomon and could not find a recording of it in my collection or on line. Quite a sad thing). The “Well Tempered Clavier” has been a favorite of mine for many years- and to think of fingers, and the associated possibilities is simply scrumptious. I guess what I am saying is welcome back for a stay and Hallelujah, all in all I enjoyed the banquet. thanks Joanne
This Poem was Critiqued By: Latorial D. Faison On Date: 2011-10-18 00:29:06
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Hi Joanne! Surprise! Yes, it is I (Latorial). I have missed you all. This is an extraordinary poem, and I needed to read it. It's so creative, so clever, so deep, and so refined. It's a picture of a pretty poem, a handsome bunch of words that come together well. It's a well thought out idea of a poem. Either you are brilliant, or you are brilliant. I knew that I was intrigued by the title, but you seem to knock the ball out of the park with every poetic line that you write in this poem. Just when I think you have reached the climax of the poem, you amaze me with another line. You give musical talent and task to the body in a way that is interesting and astonishing. It's like a great piece of music, a nice song, yet a great poem. Thanks for sharing.
This Poem was Critiqued By: cheyenne smyth On Date: 2011-10-17 16:01:24
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hello Joanne, This is a marvelolus poem and one I enjoyed reading more than once. You have a good grasp of music and I wonder if you are a muscian as well as an accomplished poet? Your word choices are superb and for a free verse poem your flow is even and easy. I felt a touch of melancholy in the lines but your last quatrain is very uplifting and a perfect finale to this amazing poem. Bravo! Best wishes, cheyenne
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