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This Poem was Submitted By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2012-01-29 17:40:46 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Wooded Ground

It was night in the forest glen I paused a while there and then Behind a shadow of my self I had fled to the tranquil wood Snow set heavy upon the ground The stillness held without a sound Time and matters had ceased to be Mountains postured of majesty A pendant moon glowed upon high Trees looked upward to pierce the sky My breath wafted into the air In solitude my soul laid bare From afar a timber wolf crooned Telling the pack, "I'll be home soon" The forest gave, of thoughts seen new To the bone cold could pass on through Colors chosen of black and white Blended into the chord of night I submitted to all that be Great it was as they let me see In nature's realm, kindred winds blow I left footprints in deepened snow

Additional Notes:
A new poem yesterday. I had mixed up a word. Had to fix it!

This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2012-02-07 08:43:36
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
I have reread your piece many times, this and the previous. It always strikes me as a greeting to the world and a goodbye, sort of the Beatles, -I don’t why you say hello, I say goodbye- and in the leaving there is posterity. Maybe the snow; metaphor I assume for difficult times, at times, is more a conduit for the footsteps left behind, but nevertheless, the footsteps are there and they witness to the traveler who has contributed. A very fine piece Dellena, before and again.

This Poem was Critiqued By: cheyenne smyth On Date: 2012-01-30 17:42:23
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Dellena, This is one of your best poems, in fact I believe it is the best. I don't remember when I joined TPL but I have critiqued many poems of yours. Since then you have found a new voice or perhaps a new muse, if that is possible. In this piece you have made unique word choices which let the lines slip down the page with ease. My breath wafted into the air I stumbled on this line and my suggestion would be...My breath has soared upon the air... for the most part you have 8 syllables per line and changing that one line would give you 8 instead of 7 and keep the meaning pure. Except for the last line in the first verse you have a consistent rhyme pattern. Which adds to the charm of the poem. Bravo! Best wishses, cheyenne

This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2012-01-30 16:40:20
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Oh this is totally awesome. I know that is not what one is suppose to say in a review however your delicious poem leaves me speechless and wanting just to re-read it once again. The sounds your word couplings making dance delightfully on the tongue while the lilting meter carries the reader through your lines with ease. I must admit that I wish I had written such an exquisite poem. You've truly captured the "night" the freedom from mingling with and the wondrous enlightenment that comes from the journey. Bravo and roses at your feet. This should be a clear winner this month. Aho! Lora

This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2012-01-30 09:47:04
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dellena this is breathtaking from beginning to end. What beautiful imagery you've chosen with your own words to take us to a place and keep us there mesmerized in time while each line is clearly perfected to blend and enhance a very memorable poem. There is absolutely nothing I could add to enhance or change this post. You have definitely captured the essence of spirit, nature and being with this very profound write. Love it!!!! blessings, Deni

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