This Poem was Submitted By: Mark Andrew Hislop On Date: 2012-02-08 00:58:01 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Spell for Retrieving a Lover

“There are no facts, only interpretations” - Friedrich Nietzsche Let us calibrate. At the third stroke: the shadow of a needle seen from space. We now have our correct weight. Take the call of a kingfisher, filtered through the eardrum of a common bee: bark at it, and drink the resultant nectar. Occupy a straightjacket, test your sinews  against it. Feel the press of your own strength.  Once you have convinced no-one, compose arias but do no longer think or move in words,  as these will come undone inside your lover’s ear, emerging as black widows that will devour you both. Three days will pass, blooded under the full  moon of the Great Cat. When this hiatus ends your god-given shadow will return to you. Mute. Speak of this to no-one. Should word of this spell  reach your lover, drink heavily, sleep, and dream  no more: the worst will already have occurred. The truth is what it was, which was anything. This did not matter then, why would it now? Nothing says 'time passes' like a lily. Therefore, begone.

Copyright © February 2012 Mark Andrew Hislop

This Poem was Critiqued By: James C. Horak On Date: 2012-03-07 23:21:21
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
"Occupy a staightjacket, test your sinews/against it....very good internal rhyme. The imaginative conjuring of the last line, "Nothing says 'time passes' like a lily. very interesting. A doubly interesting quote to begin with. A poem evoking thought more than ardor. But that's fine...far more sane. JCH

This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2012-03-07 14:21:53
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
MAH, absolutely adored this piece. That the adage, -be careful what you wish for, you might get it- comes devoid of substance. Your piece adds that substance. That the difficulty in retrieving a lost love, and the likelihood that the magic will never be recaptured as remembered, is almost offset by the description and difficulty that will be required to attempt the feat. BEGONE- what a splendid metaphor to encapsulate your entire piece. Well Done.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2012-02-20 17:35:30
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Mark, You are inspirational. Do not think or move in words.... It is strange how much everything is in the context of that box. I'm going to try to write out side that box and see what flies out. I'm glad you still come here and share yourself. Your writings contain so much hope, [in youth]. Always an admirer of your works. They ring like bells of truth... I' m writing freely without deep examination... I'm begone. love it! Dellena
This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2012-02-18 14:03:08
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Incredible mix of emotions overflowing with the added mystery for the reader to unlock as thought provoking lines in to verses are like magnets - in which the reader is fed just enough to enjoy the poem in it's entirety. No other poet could duplicate such an inspiring poem it is truly your work Mark with a seal of approval from myself and I would imagine anyone who will read this. Trusting that every word in itself only holds power when you chose the others which has me in awe of such fine flawless poetry - Unless I could come up with anything to change this and I can't I see this coming in at the top level for March posts and feel assured that you have created art that will last forever. blessings, Deni
This Poem was Critiqued By: cheyenne smyth On Date: 2012-02-11 01:04:17
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.25000
Hi Mark, I thought your last poem I critiqued sounded like a love that has gone astray but this one certainly does. I admire your ability to speak of that without really saying it. You don't tell your readers what to see you show them, something that is difficult to do. Your word selection is superb and your well written lines slip down the page with ease. What inspired you to write this melancholy poem I hope is better now. Please feel free to tell me if I am wrong. Best wishes, cheyenne
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2012-02-10 17:12:04
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.50000
I love your ruminating, your pondering of potions and spells--and contemplation... Have to be honest that I did chortel through this quite a bit. While it is a sensitive subject and inwardly painfully; to address ones departure in such a manner is definitely the sign of a person who is in touch with their inner most feelings and can take a genuine sincere look at such--then share such profound thoughts with others in an extremely well crafted work. no nits or spags, congrats on an excellent work. Lora
This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Steven Scheffer On Date: 2012-02-08 16:40:51
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
MAH, I see Queen Mab hath been with you. Goddamn it if I don't hop on a plane and get down there right away. Better yet: a sailboat, and alone. Rimbaud was a prick he says. Nietzsche . . . now there was a prick. This poem gives me the creepy jeepies. Therefore . . . a huge success. MSS PS - you wanna crit? I lay you 5 to 1 I beat your ass and get the top critiquer award. If you want the action, don't announce it publicly. You have more friends here than I do. :)
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