Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

This Poem was Submitted By: Ellen K Lewis On Date: 2012-02-10 01:14:26 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!

Click Here To add this poem to your "Voting Possibilities" list!

May I Have This Romance?

Hello my dear, my darling thru these years I've been sitting quietly..over here..watchin' them over there, watchin' us.. and wondering.. and so, beautiful lady we needn't be bashful-we needn't be graceful our steps still fold together and honey we need to dance! and the band plays our song oh we've danced to this for so long ...singing it while we fell in love oh yes! My fair lady, "May I have this romance?" let the stars shine in your eyes and the myrth spill from your lips let your soul mingle with mine its~ our~ romance.. your heart is as light as a feather we've been dancing together forever yes, yes Lets dance!

This Poem was Critiqued By: James C. Horak On Date: 2012-03-07 22:45:17
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
The lightly mixed rhyme is delightful, escaping the perception of contrivance. As is the least contrived circumstances for "falling in love" the most compelling. Lovely to a man that a lady wrote this. We men tend to think of courting as labor. But not if we're advised better. As so you have. JCH

This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Andrew Hislop On Date: 2012-03-04 18:59:51
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dear Ellen I like the sense here of an old couple who are as in love now as they were when they were young... ...a state for us all to aspire to, don't you think? Best wishes, Mark.

This Poem was Critiqued By: cheyenne smyth On Date: 2012-02-26 00:25:03
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.57143
Hi Ellen, This is a delightful poem. I must assume you have written about your husband or lover perhaps they are the same. How wonderful to be in love after many years have passed. We should all be so lucky! You have chosen expressive words and he flow is like liquid falling. You have good alliteration of 'w' sounds in the firat verse and each line has been craftedd with care. Well done. Best wishes, cheyenne

This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2012-02-18 13:57:25
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Pure in it's own right of showing how love can be very real and long lasting through all seasons in life. It's tender, mesmerizing and hold the reader's attention but better yet it is full of happiness that comes from within when love exists - This kind of love is the dance - the dance such as in Garth Brooks famous song - You have touched my heart with this poem - and I would like to find someone to dance with now! blessings, Deni

This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2012-02-11 09:59:52
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Ellen, attempting a piece such as this is always taking a chance- some like a more salacious look at things (and I don’t mind that) and some want less or more clues- and then some just don’t care for poetry that a static view of a motion filled experience- and me- well… anytime I can look in and see romance, dancing, and sex on the horizon; well I’m there. I assume –myrth- is your own concoction for the perfume of –myhrr- and the happiness of –mirth- and I adore the word. I have this evil feeling of co-opting the word for some future project. I would feel guilty, but I’d give credit- who knows? One thing that immediately struck a chord with me was the simplicity of the verse matching the continuity of the love affair and relationship. I am not sure you meant such, but they coordinate into a well rounded view of the image. A very nice way to spend a few minutes wishing for the same.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2012-02-10 17:02:30
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.50000
Hello Ellen, Such a nice romantic write and so fitting for the season. I really liked the way you had a conversation--it flows naturally and draws your reader in with all your great discripters and word couplings. Only suggestion is, 2S 1L drop the "And" at the beginning of the line...not needed and distracts. I enjoyed reading this poem, it was uplifting and hopeful, thanks for the post. Lora

Poetry Contests Online at The Poetic Link

Click HERE to return to ThePoeticLink.com Database Page!