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Passions Lamentation My lips move to speak yet my thoughts won’t release any words can’t be formed at this time. So, I let out a breath and step back in to check what clearly had been on my mind. I sigh and regress to the thoughts I thought best to deliver through air aid us to repair a love no others commenced hand in hand and “I Do.” The rapid pulses along each day seemed to end and escape us along the way. At moments this whole heart feels wrecked purely in constant regret. Love needs to mend in adoration taking one small step. Call the wild beast in me vague, idiotic, irrational and done yet keep this thought which I cannot speak I will love you till I visit my last setting sun. |
This Poem was Critiqued By: Ellen K Lewis On Date: 2012-06-29 20:37:02
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hello Deni
Your piece is a roller coaster! lol I like it because I can feel your push toward the unspoken
I really like this:
I sigh and regress to the thoughts I thought best
^^ catchy and fun ^^
This is a silly thing but since I saw it, I thought I'd say it. I'm pretty sure most people would never cross their minds so I hope you dont mind me pointing it out. :)
>>purely in constant regret.<<
I wish that wasnt there! Not pure not constant...!....maybe just sometimes, maybe impure or something.
Like I said, its just a thought
~Smiles to you~~ Ellen