This Poem was Submitted By: Ellen K Lewis On Date: 2012-12-18 01:07:55 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
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Drying Up oh for the days when my soul
could look upon the page of my poem
the things that spilled out
from the depths of me
and a relief would come in
as a flowing water
overwhelming me
driving me back for
a breath of fresh air
that I could relive
whatever had been
with my eyes
this time
open.
Now is the day when my soul
is bound within its coil
and the tears in my heart
bring no words to my poem
no flowing water
to push me forward
stagnant and murky, spoiled
and nearly dry
lest I should try to relive
the way I wanted it to be
tried hard for it to be
but this time I can not
open my heart. |
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Copyright © December 2012 Ellen K Lewis
This Poem was Critiqued By: Joe Gustin On Date: 2012-12-29 14:14:55
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
I believe every poet, artist, songwriter has felt this at one time or another in their creative experience. How ever your poem is eloquent and well versed. I remember the fresh ink and sharp quills of my youth.
The absolute walls of writer's block. This poem has its water, because it flows beautifully
This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2012-12-29 10:25:48
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Ellen, I appreciate the comparison of inspiration and –fresh air-. That –things that spilled out- is the measure of the task; that you have gifted us with this is the travail of the soul.
That we should have those times of –stagnant and murky / nearly dry- is an indication of the genius that remains. Once again you grant us a look, by inverse description, of the importance contained in the genius.
I would counter –but this time I can not open my heart- with the piece I just read. Apparently, maybe not of the substance you desire, still remains the contribution to inspire. What remains for me is the –my soul is bound within its coil and the tears in my heart-. We may all empathize with such a condition.
I enjoyed the read.
This Poem was Critiqued By: cheyenne smyth On Date: 2012-12-27 12:09:47
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Hi Ellen,
This poem is a creative way of describing writer's block. Good alliteration in it/to and this/time. Your use of enjambents is excellent. The flow is like liquid falling down the page, I love the theme and the expressivee words. I have failed at picking a favorite line or phrase as I like them all. Bravo!
Best wishes,
cheyenne
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