This Poem was Submitted By: Joe Gustin On Date: 2015-10-28 21:04:27 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
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Home
If we are what we seek
then let us seek love
To fully discover the depths
of its wonder
to set death asunder
To breathe it in
like a fine wine's bouquet
To touch it, to taste it
to melt the walls away
Maybe then we'll discover a
great new wind that
will blow though our skin
and rekindle the dying light
If we are what we wish
then let it be a soul
that out runs the moon
out lasts the sun
to finely find its' way home
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Copyright © October 2015 Joe Gustin
This Poem was Critiqued By: charles r pitts On Date: 2015-11-01 21:37:47
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.71429
If only humanity sought out only the love in the world. It would truly be a paradise! My favorite lines here: "To fully discover the depths of its wonder to set death asunder" For I believe love is truly more everlasting than life or death. I like the non-rhyming yet lyrical words you put together here--the fragrant bouquet of love that can be touched and tasted as well...living our lives with love and rekindling
that fire that is slowly dying around us in the world today. Thought-provoking and charming submission.
This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2015-10-30 19:02:00
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Joe; this is your very best this month - I can't say all that I feel good about in this write.
Every verse is felt, seen and I stepped in to this just wanting to stay and feel comfortable.
Poignant love filled emotions written with a heart that understands love in ways others may never know.
"If we are what we wish then let it be a soul that runs the moon out - (Excellent)
out lasts the sun (intense) to finely find it's way home -
As a homeless romantic I applaud your work - All we really seek is love -
beautiful poem
Deni
This Poem was Critiqued By: Wanda S. Thibodeaux On Date: 2015-10-30 00:29:20
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.53846
Hi there Joe, this is a fine poem. I really enjoyed reading it. I like that you have used 'Home' as the title. It gives it such a logical place to seek: "If we are what we seek/then let us seek love/to fully discover the depths/of its wonder/to set death asunder///If we are what we wish/then let it be a soul/that out runs the moon/outlasts the sun/to finally find its way home." Oops...you think like me and type words like they sound even tho you know better...last line...finely should be finally...lol, of course, I read it three times before I saw it. You have really made great strides in your writing since I was here. This poem is complete, reads beautifully, has great energy and imagery. Great post!
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