This Poem was Submitted By: Joe Gustin On Date: 2015-11-28 12:07:06 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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If I were the wind

If I were the wind I would play in your hair  all day If I were the sun I would rise only to illuminate your face. As stars I would dust your shoulders your eyes As a snowflake I would sacrifice myself to the warmth  of your flesh

Copyright © November 2015 Joe Gustin

This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2015-12-02 09:05:18
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
I love the imagery and tone set in this poem Joe. Just enough but not too much - that leans on loving care with a very different approach - it's really good - I love the last verse- you would give your all - it stands out knowing the snowflake would melt - Loved this one - blessings, Deni

This Poem was Critiqued By: Wanda S. Thibodeaux On Date: 2015-11-30 04:16:06
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.85714
Joe, a very sweet brevity. A love poem dedicated to the wind, sun, stars, and snowflakes. Very charming and whimsical. Great write...
This Poem was Critiqued By: Ashni Irey On Date: 2015-11-29 03:50:12
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.85714
Every line is beautiful! A woman should be SO lucky to have someone like you write such beautiful words about her. I wonder.. do the ladies you write about ever get to read your poems? The snowflake passage is my favourite. It made me tremble a little.
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