This Poem was Submitted By: Joe Gustin On Date: 2016-03-06 00:16:55 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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For Me

For me the stars are the  ultimate night light That banish the demons of  my regrets, the frets  of my debts.  Of the i o u's  I owe only  to you I wish the earth could spin in a  way that I could understand Allowing the clouds to talk to me as if in some fluffy Morris code The bee could mark time in sync with the humming bird With the surrendering of the sun and the rise of flowers facing up Spring brings the hope of new Summer know the length of a shadow's hue Autumn is the only time the year realizes that it is mortal  And winter seals the bet In all of this you are sleeping  in my chair   

Copyright © March 2016 Joe Gustin


This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Steven Scheffer On Date: 2016-03-30 15:30:18
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Joe, You always had a nice lyricism to everything you write. It's odd. When I read you its as if I'm reading lines from a genius that have to be translated into another language before being read, and some of the lines get garbled coming through - but some retain the original genius. Mark


This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2016-03-17 16:08:06
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Your poem has such a sad tone about it - and that sadness comes out within each of your verses - You're living for today but are holding on to something that needs to be let go of - and it's difficult to say what it could be - The ending is very mysterious in my opinion - You have some very rich imagery and testaments to the Seasons - the only thing I would change would be the choice of the word "Fluffy" to describe Morris Code - I'd go with "tapping" or "Clicking" because using "Clouds" doesn't mean you have to have a common word that goes with clouds for the description - otherwise I love this Joe -I really do - blessings, Deni
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