This Poem was Submitted By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2016-05-11 10:31:13 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Edges of Eggshells Shaped To Slice

I rise when you fall to pieces lifting the load to carry you through when I fall you sink lower my discontentment dulls my view What breaks within your spirit comes around and around My heart is ailing to heal  your soul bargains for anything to steal Every good intent with possibility is tossed aside  to a place where my reach  is shortened with time If you can’t get back up and find a miraculous spark  then you must leave this enriched and empowering  path I’ve found allow me to find my own way to make a new start 

Copyright © May 2016 DeniMari Z.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2016-06-07 15:24:24
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
DeniMari- The telling moment, not of the reassembly assistance, but of the realization that if reassembled incorrectly, or even ignored, the path that grants true healing it to find it on one’s own. I don’t know the genesis of the poem. I assume many are missing the point with you and aggravating the loss, but I do understand the splintered pieces, and the improbability that the future holds. As with the revalation; to come to the resolution, hope is a must. I think, for those around who wish to grant a respite, they need to understand that what the fallen needs, is encouragement and hope- to feed the self-realization of truth, and true healing. Well said. Very well said.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Joe Gustin On Date: 2016-05-15 08:52:39
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
An interesting dynamic between to souls. Your are the rescue the other who is always in need of rescuing. Its as if they need to always need to be low. So like trying to save a drowning person sometimes you have to swim away before they drown you to. Such honesty so clearly stated
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