This Poem was Submitted By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2016-06-03 22:41:50 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!To Listen to Music While Reading this Poem, just Click Here!
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Woe Will Not Win Perhaps
I should go out at night
with my black umbrella
to cover the darkness
surrounding my life
ponder my thoughts
without sunlight
We are the children
the chosen ones
of matters added
beyond the norm
Sadness takes lead
as if fate chose us all
to walk with the weight
yet stand ten feet tall
We survive
the storms
of torrential rains
draw back up
to walk again
Perhaps
I should stay in at night
consider what is wrong
or what is right
No one knows
what time
will bring
but if my umbrella
is dry
there will be no suffering
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Copyright © June 2016 DeniMari Z.
Additional Notes:
Thoughts; of how some people seem to carry more burdens than others - knowing we are suppose to be trusted with it all - then again what we think is bad is something good to someone else in this world -
This Poem was Critiqued By: Ashni Irey On Date: 2016-09-03 08:36:48
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Such a beautifully expressed poem about pain. I think what I liked the most about this is the poet facing every rainy night with an umbrella. I love the clarity of choice in that most people who suffer have gotten used to it, or rather, repeatedly forgive the cause of the pain and go back to it intentionally, often stronger.. and dare I say.. expecting it to stop or change in some way?
Love you always, Deni. Ash
This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2016-06-10 11:24:39
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Deni, such a very difficult subject to write to, both as the protagonist, and as the interpreter of solutions.
I have a very personal experience, and yet on a global scale, frustration is more often the result.
Being the “chosen ones”, for any set of benefactor responsibilities is always that duality of what is and what must be. I wonder if the “darkness” and the “black umbrella” are more metaphors for the duality of being an unseen benefactor, and also being a shade when strength is no longer there to continue the rescue.
“We survive”, as I said, I have personal experience as well as an opinion globally that makes many uncomfortable. It is my thought that until the discomfort of the world upsets the apple cart, few will willingly sacrifice for the need.
Anyway, I appreciate your piece. Many facets to its interpretation. Mostly, I hope you find strength and appreciation for your personal experience.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2016-06-08 19:50:25
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Your poem speaks volumes of philosophy and belief, yes--chosen will suffer, nothing comes without a battle or sacrifice it seems and yet who determines what is construed as suffering or is it just a right of passage so to speak. The depth of your offering gives a close look into one who has or is coming to accept one's self as is, all facades torn down, priorities shifting, self awareness unique to former understanding. A most enlightening and enjoyable read. Best always, Lora
This Poem was Critiqued By: Joe Gustin On Date: 2016-06-05 08:54:44
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
I really like how you bring the umbrella to poetic purpose in this poem. I wonder if being a poet gives such persons of trail and pain experiences beyond most to sharpen their perceptions and ability to express them.
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