This Poem was Submitted By: Robert Wyma On Date: 2004-09-06 15:27:09 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Arthurian Ode - Part One

A kingly babe by heaven’s heart sent through thunderous clap and darkness corrupt birthed the blest in legend to be met carefully disguised in destinies thrust. The knights are plenty and castles stone cold wrapped in pageants and glamorous gloss the pagans once bold, turned sour and old England embraces the Roman Church cross. The life of church and crown are parched spilling blood in the waste of war as the comforting hearth, lost to the march of drunk lusty power beyond England’s door. The once great Merlin has left all behind to steward the vision gifted by powers while star wrapped signs mark well the decline of wizards tradition as Christianity flowers. Merlin wears patience like a time worn saddle steering the plan from devious loss as mixed forces battle, spending men as chattel while courts of comfort ledger the cost. The seasons march past, and no hints betray Arthur’s purpose uncommon, yet plainly bound in the promise of hope, he bears the oath blind to cause still sleeping sound. His course well marked by destinies dance Arthur wanders to the old man's fire where ripened chance, grows circumstance and the mystic’s true sight, reveals the higher. “Arthur, come near, and I’ll view the worth warming the promise to England and man heritage has cursed, by stardust and earth a battle of forces bound in your plan.” “Merlin of the Woods, you bait such replies like clever court gossip, scheming to drop truth bound lies, in riddled disguise to engage my ear, and hold my stop.” The Wizard stare is beyond the youth, “I see well into distant dark days when man will choose, the promise of truth and lift the heart with unstained displays.” “Arthur, my view is wide without waste the time we spend could stop this day marking the place, that forked my fate and darkened the light of divinities play.” “I will tell you this, young Arthur of light your kingdom awaits like a promised bride dressed in white, she will lift histories sight to the greatness of good, through the darkness of pride.” “It is for you young Arthur, to weigh this well for the future will catch, the words that fall echoing the spell, that marks heaven or hell and the freedom enshrined in humanities call.” “Old wicked wizard, our time is done and I must sleep to find the true when the morn has come, our fate will be won and the high will reveal the place for you.”

Copyright © September 2004 Robert Wyma

Additional Notes:
More to follow..... I hope.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Latorial D. Faison On Date: 2004-10-03 11:06:02
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Robert, this is passionately written with much respect for the history of England. I was more amazed as each stanza and line went on by. Poets have different motivations, and I'm always astounded when I come across poetry whose motivations are different from my own, because I know what it takes to write a poem. It does take passion and it takes pride, love and yearning for the subject inside. You have skillfully crafted this poem. It's brilliant use of language sets the tone which is required. I felt like I, myself, was somewhere in King Arthur's court bearing witness to all that unfolds. I think you do a wonderful job of articulating the scene with poetry. The reader is drawn in. To be honest, I felt like I was reading a Shakespearean play. I could picture it all. I'd be interested in seeing the "more" that will come after this. It will make a great piece in total. I'm curious, did you study literature anywhere? This is some great writing, and I'm glad that you shared it at TPL this month. The title is so aesthetic, and what follows is a poem so rich in history and creativity. Poetic genius. Great work. Latorial

This Poem was Critiqued By: Erzahl Leo M. Espino On Date: 2004-09-27 23:36:28
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Robert, What a great great poem! The whole package is a classic! Your strict A-B-A-B format is perfect and delightful! It adds beauty to your art here! Poetically and lyrically musical to the ears! I like this stanza best: “Arthur, my view is wide without waste the time we spend could stop this day marking the place, that forked my fate and darkened the light of divinities play.” - Unforgettable! This piece highlights your talent as a brilliant writer! Rich in history and at the same time with art! Overall, an outstanding work! Keep on writing! - where’s part two, three…will there be any coming? As always, Erzahl :)
This Poem was Critiqued By: Joanne M Uppendahl On Date: 2004-09-16 12:55:26
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Robert: It's wonderful to see a poem of yours again! I think this one is the perfect prelude to a series and hope you'll gift us with it when you are ready! I've delayed responding to this, because it is lengthy and also as I wanted to give you my 'best' and I've been in a bit of a blue funk lately. The potential disbanding of this website (which appears to be OK for the time being) and this time of the year brings back strong feelings of melancholy. But with your fresh poem, and a fresh day before me I feel energized. The work itself is so rich with drama, color, imagery and metaphor. I love narrative poems, though my familiarity with the King Arthur legend isn't what I wish it were, I feel as though I learned a great deal from your poem and am eager for more. The first line pulled me in -- especially "by heaven's heart sent" as I think that the Architect of the Universe has planned wondrous things for us, and continues to send us those, "blest in legend" and also "carefully disguised" so that we are mostly unaware of the true meaning of their words and actions, but the messages get past our conscious censors, or cynical moments of disbelief and our somewhat jaded perceptions in the midst of a materialistic world. Your rhyming and meter are masterful are evidence of a seasoned craftsman at work, and someone who loves the noble legends with their metaphysical import. The knights are plenty and castles stone cold wrapped in pageants and glamorous gloss --Ah, the problem of 'word glamour' mentioned by AB the pagans once bold, turned sour and old England embraces the Roman Church cross. Clever rhyming of "gloss/cross" delivers a somewhat sardonic tone in this stanza, for we know that the struggle between church and 'unorthodox' world views has been bloody and often politicized. As you show so ably in the stanza below: The life of church and crown are parched spilling blood in the waste of war as the comforting hearth, lost to the march of drunk lusty power beyond England’s door. These lines seem to have a 'life of their own' in a manner of speaking. The rhythm suggests the "march" of "power" and the added foot in this line gives emphasis! The once great Merlin has left all behind to steward the vision gifted by powers while star wrapped signs mark well the decline of wizards(') tradition as Christianity flowers. Merlin wears patience like a time worn saddle --especially apt metaphor here steering the plan from devious loss as mixed forces battle, spending men as chattel while courts of comfort ledger the cost. The above stanza shows how little things have changed. "spending men as chattel" is today's news, but I wonder who the patient Merlin of today might be? A speculative thought on my part, only. The seasons march past, and no hints betray Arthur’s purpose uncommon, yet plainly bound in the promise of hope, he bears the oath blind to cause still sleeping sound. His course well marked by destinies dance Arthur wanders to the old man's fire where ripened chance, grows circumstance and the mystic’s true sight, reveals the higher.--those who've read widely in mystical works, especially late nineteenth and early twentieth century will recognize the import here. “Arthur, come near, and I’ll view the worth warming the promise to England and man heritage has cursed, by stardust and earth a battle of forces bound in your plan.” “Merlin of the Woods, you bait such replies like clever court gossip, scheming to drop truth bound lies, in riddled disguise to engage my ear, and hold my stop.” The Wizard stare is beyond the youth, “I see well into distant dark days when man will choose, the promise of truth and lift the heart with unstained displays.” “Arthur, my view is wide without waste the time we spend could stop this day marking the place, that forked my fate and darkened the light of divinities play.” “I will tell you this, young Arthur of light your kingdom awaits like a promised bride dressed in white, she will lift histories sight to the greatness of good, through the darkness of pride.” Last evening I watched a program on CS Lewis and Freud and the idea of God. I learned it was CS Lewis who said that the greatest sin of all is pride: "For Pride is a spiritual cancer: it eats up the very possibility of love, or contentment, or even common sense." “It is for you young Arthur, to weigh this well for the future will catch, the words that fall echoing the spell, that marks heaven or hell and the freedom enshrined in humanities call.” --double 'l' sounds add to the sense of magic here “Old wicked wizard, our time is done and I must sleep to find the true when the morn has come, our fate will be won and the high will reveal the place for you.” This last stanza is rich with layered meanings. I especially enjoyed L2 with its implication that we must "sleep to find the true" for our conscious minds have little recognition of truth, it seems. If we are one quarter conscious and three quarters unconscious, as the Jungians believe (if I understand correctly) then the greater part of intelligence would have to be accessed through sleep or meditation I think. Perhaps it is the source of this excellent poem - for it has the feeling of an inspired work. Bravo! Congratulations on a fascinating and enlightening poem. I look forward to the second installment. All my best, Joanne
This Poem was Critiqued By: Jana Buck Hanks On Date: 2004-09-13 12:07:13
Critiquer Rating During Critique: Unknown
Oh Robert, this piece just thrilled me, I love the whole thing and am waiting anxiously for the continuation. This tale is in-depth and the characterizations are so real, I think you ought to do this as a book....there can never be too much said about Authur and Merlin!!! The metaphorical language gives me chills. Keep right on writing! Bright Blessings Jana
This Poem was Critiqued By: James Edward Schanne On Date: 2004-09-07 09:43:52
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.75000
Here comes christianity and Merlin sees it coming along with Arthurs rise in power, it reads real well I thought. I'll be interested to see if some body else Thinks there's any flaws in it, Because I got to be honset I don't, The once great Merlin has left all behind to steward the vision gifted by powers while star wrapped signs mark well the decline of wizards tradition as Christianity flowers. This stanza boils down everything pretty well and then is used as a spring board to let the words bounce forth and they leap right into my eyes. Thanks for posting and letting me comment.
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