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God has blessed my life. How do I know? He has given me five sound senses... to see the magnificence of your charming smile, that affectionately put a rainbow scarlet between your rosy cheeks, beckoning my sight-- all day long. to listen the tenderness of your dulcet voice, that benignly blew a zephyr, suffusing refreshment in every corner of my room; a shiver of inscrutable sinew ran through my body, a brand-new, luscious life is born in me-- all night long. to taste the delicacy of your saccharine kindness, that promisingly unlocked the gate of love for me to take refuge-- all year long. to smell the aroma of your ambrosial friendship, that marvelously built a mighty bridge for me to cross over the lake of desolation; from forlorn desert you have drawn me back to a field billowing Elysian memories-- all life long. and to hold you to the zenith of my dreams, where lavish love on sapphire is engraved-- forever long.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Regis L Chapman On Date: 2004-01-29 12:37:35
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
I am noticing a trend here. Elysium is in 2 of the poems I have reviewed here so far, and I can see the voice of this poet coming out, as I tackle the poems one by one. I like the procession of this poem, and it's a little bit of tension to know if it ends in sorrow or not. It's nice to see one that doesn't end that way. I also like the idea that senses are beyond the physical. Great job, and the style of your voice is becoming clearer here. Thanks, REEG!
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