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This Poem was Submitted By: stephen g skipper On Date: 2005-02-08 17:03:26 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Prelude To A Kiss

Through the mists of time, we are parting the veils of mystery, as we now meet again. Don't waste your life, on a single wish, for that longing kiss. Bring me a boat with sides of silver blue, lets sail away, to the new dawn, glorious in all its majesty. I'm caught up in the thrill of the chase, tingles down my spine and my skin on fire, lips slightly open and moist. Air filled with the heady scent of lust! A kiss so hot yet tender, so passionate yet chaste, rare is real love. Let's just enjoy the taste.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Patricia Gibson-Williams On Date: 2005-03-05 17:58:20
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.00000
I seem to be having a lot of trouble concentrating today, but I wanted to comment on your poem because I thought it was beautiful. So very sensual and rythmic. I wish I could tell you line by line how it affected me and what I got out of it, but I just can't seem to figure out why I liked and what to say. Maybe in a few days I'll think of something other then I liked it and I'll send you a message, but for now that will have to be enough. If this doesn't make sense blame it on my killer headache... but your poem has helped soothe it just a bit. Patti

This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2005-03-03 12:10:59
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Stephen, I really like hot. It can’t be too raw, but must be “hot” enough that to be too raw is not necessary. Yours is a piece that meets that character. Prelude To A Kiss – A philosophical title, it explains where you are going and why. Metaphoric in and of itself. Through the mists of time, we are parting the veils of mystery, as we now meet again. – “Mists”, “Veils”, “Mystery”, and now we meet “again”. There is a totality of excitement about this verse that belies a previous meeting. It explains, in a back door sense, how things should b, but also how, hopefully, they will remain!! Don't waste your life, on a single wish, for that longing kiss. – this stanza explains the last. It’s gotta be more!! I want more, listen to me!! I offer more!! Bring me a boat with sides of silver blue, lets sail away, to the new dawn, glorious in all its majesty. – Your stanza takes us on the journey, the adventure of an appealing interaction of heart and soul, the “glorious”, the “new dawn”, and the “majesty”. How poignant a thought, how alive the moment. I'm caught up in the thrill of the chase, tingles down my spine and my skin on fire, lips slightly open and moist. – A stanza after my longing heart, for the thrill of the chase heightens every aspect of the moment. I have delayed the gratification of the kiss, because I wished that “eminence” of particulation to be preserved, just one moment longer. In the end, it is the kiss, I was looking in, and wishing it were you looking in at me. Stephen, you caught the moment, and we have persevered!! SPLENDID, Bravo!!

This Poem was Critiqued By: arnie s WACHMAN On Date: 2005-02-17 18:59:38
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.88889
Well, I just critiqued another one of your poems, and this one I find much better laid and better written. Ummm, lusty ... love that word. Brings back a ton of memories. Bring me a boat with sides of silver blue,....I find this line fascinating, wondering why silver blue... lets sail away, to the new dawn, glorious in all its majesty...around here the dawn's for the most part are majestic... so I understand... Don't waste your life, on a single wish, for that longing kiss.....ah yes...let there be more of them! A kiss so hot yet tender, so passionate yet chaste, rare is real love............true true true. However very subjective eh? Nice. Keep them coming. Thanks for letting me in.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Sandee L McMullan On Date: 2005-02-16 00:18:00
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.92857
Title: Prelude To A Kiss Title has a sense of drama, as I expect love lines to unfold, I am curious how they will rhyme or fall, I want to know what the prelude is. Sentiments in the simple form of this poem, brings out the personal intimacy intended by the narrator. Well done. However, many lines and phrases are said this way many times. Try for the freshes and most unique way to describe the wish /kiss, longing/ loving. Break the barriers of images here, blow my mind with newness. Be my drama of love here. Some cliche phrases ex "thrill of the chase" tingles down my spine" "skin on fire" weakens this otherwise yearning poem. I like the sense of taste at the end -- bringing the arousal and passion to a summit. yum. This poem does capture the urgency of a kiss. I enjoyed and the meter was lively similar to a chase. . . . regards

This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2005-02-11 01:48:19
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.81818
Stephen you have created a lovely poem filled with your love and most important your heart......you are still filled with Paula and of her being in your life.......rare is real love....indeed it is rare and that a love like yours shall never die, perhaps take on a different meaning, as you have often visited and loved with Paula since her passing.......she would want you to be happy again my friend .......good structure and word flow, love the images and feelings created with the flare of your pen and it is so appropriate for this time of the year......thanks for posting and sharing with us.....be safe, God Bless, Claire

This Poem was Critiqued By: Turner Lee Williams On Date: 2005-02-10 15:11:17
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Stephen--Immediately, this post reads like a reunion of two from a past relationship; "Through the mists of time, we are parting the veils of mystery, as we now meet again." There are almost surreal qualities herein that make me want to pose "Oh, if this be a dream, let me not awake..."; "Bring me a boat of sides with silver blue, lets sail away, to the new dawn, glorious in all its majesty." And, on the other hand the piece turns quite amorous in stanza #4 as pro- tagonist inference through hyperbole some wanton desires. Yes, whatever this pair had/have is now past boiling, check the smell; "Air filled with the heady scent of lust!" Poignant oxymoronic (rhyming) ending enhances this tasteful done quasi-erotic offering. Hope I did not miss your intentions. It is nice to see a post from you-smile. TLW

This Poem was Critiqued By: Elaine Marie Phalen On Date: 2005-02-10 14:54:56
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Hi Stephen, I always enjoy reading a good love poem! (I don't write them at all well, so I seldom try). There's something mystical about this one, as if for a moment the speaker has managed to will himself into the past. He's undoing a wrong - a missed opportunity now being made right. It's not absolutely clear whether the woman he loves is actually present with him in the flesh, or merely in his imaginings. Is he dreaming this kiss? Or is it a second chance, come 'round again? Bring me a boat with sides of silver blue, let[']s sail away, to the new dawn, glorious in all its majesty. This is an unexpected image in the middle of the speaker's fantasy. It suggests he's not totally happy with where he's ended up, and is desperately wishing he can begin all over. The silver/blue colors and the image of the dawn imply a visionary experience. Then we move into a description of the speaker's passion and, again, wonder whether it's an actual encounter or a dream state. In many ways, it doesn't make any difference. He's recreating the original intensity of his desire. She - either the real-time lover or imaginary mate - is fully reciprocating. The last line speaks of a place and situation where there is no time at all. They're suspended, immersed in each other. I'm hoping this is an actual meeting of the lips and not a remembered, longed-for encounter locked in the past. I vote for the real thing! Anyway, the poem is evocative and intense. It certainly fulfils the title's promise. Brenda

This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2005-02-09 14:19:59
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Stephen, I have read this poem several times...it is so well written...a tale of lust. At first I thought you were looking into the past and writing about Paula.....'parting the veils of mystry as we now meet again'...but then the words began to hold a different meaning for me. Instead of looking back into the past I think you are looking ahead to the future. Someone you knew in your past that has now come back into your life, perhaps....'don't waste your life on a single kiss'....don't keep a memory alive to the extent that no one can get close to you and over come the wall you have erected to protect you from the pain of loss....'lets sail away to a new dawn'...this is a statement of hope and excitment for what the future holds for you....'I am caught up in the thrill of the chase'...the chase is the most exciting part of any new relationship and some even abandon the object of their affection at the climax of the chase. ...'air filled with the heady scent of lust'...this is a sensual line and to me it shows promise that you are moving on in your life....'rare is real love'...truer words were never spoken. I think real love only comes around once in a persons life....'Let's just enjoy the taste'...this line is so poingant and sums up all the preceeding lines. Enjoy life...enjoy the company of other women...life is too short not to do these things and if the right one comes along you will know that without hesitation. I hope I have not completely fractured your intended meaning of this piece...but it speak to me in this manner and I feel happiness for you...you have waited a long time! Peace...Marilyn

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