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This Poem was Submitted By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2005-06-02 16:59:51 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Mea Culpa

Cloudy skies and raindrop eyes, the dove of peace lives beyond. If I'm always angry with you how do I get past resentment? Will world's darkness ever persist? Hatred binds me firmly to hate. One can't exist without sun's light. All grassy slopes connects to high and seasoned waters pass on by... Mea culpa!

Additional Notes:
Hatred binds one to the hated [I-Ching]

This Poem was Critiqued By: Mandie J Overocker On Date: 2005-06-22 15:45:22
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.47368
Cloudy skies and raindrop eyes - I love this line. Full of imagery and well written, this piece tickles my fancy. I am curious if you intentionally tried to make each line with the same number of syllables, oir if that just happened. the only two that are short a syllable would be the first two and i wouldn't want to see those change, they open the piece so lovely. if you wanted each line to have the same syllables perhaps sticking to a seven syllable line instead of eight would work... but i have trouble with some lines making that work. is this a particular form i am not aware of? Mea culpa! indeed...you've written a marvelous piece here...thank you for sharing. Mandie

This Poem was Critiqued By: Rachel F. Spinoza On Date: 2005-06-18 09:28:36
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi, Dellena excellent in rhyme, form, theme and cadence Cloudy skies and raindrop eyes,[neat expression ] the dove of peace lives beyond. If I'm always angry with you how do I get past resentment? Will world's darkness ["--ever" as persist is inclusive] persist? Hatred binds me firmly to hate. One can't exist without sun's light ["sunlight" would be smoother but might miss a subtle message?]. All grassy slopes connect[-s] to high [i love these two lines!} and seasoned waters pass on by... Mea culpa! [good!} best Roni

This Poem was Critiqued By: Joanne M Uppendahl On Date: 2005-06-11 14:52:57
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dellena: Cloudiness and tears and the unavailable peace dove give this piece a very melancholy feel. You show us with imagery how difficult it is to live (love) with anger. It spoils the brew. There's an old adage that the cook who stirs the broth stirs in his (or her) feelings. It is if anger lends a bitter taste to the soup. And Dellena, as always there is so much more to your poetry than a first glance reveals. The question you pose, I cannot answer. Sometimes resentment, I feel, is like burning embers which must burn themselves out and eventually turn to white ashes. Then we may poke around a while and consider what has been lost. My favorite lines in this poem are the closing ones: All grassy slopes connect to high ---simply lovely! and poignant and seasoned waters pass on by… Feeling in the valley. The “seasoned waters pass on by…” says so much and yet allows me to fill in with my own feelings of being ‘stuck’ many times, or left behind while I pondered, struggling with all my emotions. You bring us along with you, as much as is possible through written words. The sunlight required to live is something that, while you may not realize it, you give out … so continously. Hugs, Joanne

This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2005-06-09 09:50:32
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
I am impressed with your graphic symbolism, while spoken softly this writing is hard hitting. Poet you have echoed so much of the feeling and sentiment of the concious person. Your statement "Will world's darkness ever persist? Hatred binds me firmly to hate. One can't exist without sun's light. reminds us or should I say warns us, that hatred is a one way street and there is no winning unless with let the light into our hearts. You definately set the mind to thinking.

This Poem was Critiqued By: arnie s WACHMAN On Date: 2005-06-04 14:58:06
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
When I was a hippie (once a hippie always?) I studied the I-Ching with a Master. That was one heck of a time of my life. I still have the coins! It says hatred binds one to the hated BUT it doesn't tell you to hate!In the Book Of Changes it teaches you to be Receptive (#2). So what's the sense of carrying around hatred? You get past resentment by letting go...being centred...and meditate. Don't get yourself all bound and wound up over something which can probably be undone or let go...easy said huh? Good luck. Mea Culpa? good title for this piece but what is it that you are asking for forgiveness? Don't answer that! Not my business.Some grassy slopes lead to rock walls too...black vs white...that's what the I Ching is all about.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2005-06-04 06:37:32
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Mea Culpa.....good title for this one my friend........certainly is filled with emotion....good structure, word flow, images created with the flow of your pen......I can see me now, kneeling in church praying and touching my chest three times......Mea Culpa, Mea Culpa, Mea Culpa......... raindrop eyes is very touching..........the dove of peace lives beyond......at least you are acknowledging that peace is within reach if you could only get past he bitterness in your heart and soul.....hatred is a horrible thing my friend........perhaps the fear associated with it at times makes it twice as heard to be rid of it........when one thinks of hatred one may travel in many directions..........is the hatred against a person, a place, a belief, even oneself......thanks for posting, God continues to bless your work.....Claire

This Poem was Critiqued By: Duane J Jackson On Date: 2005-06-03 22:51:00
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Hi Dellena, I wasn't too familiar with the meaning of Mea Culpa but looked it up. Mea Culpa is an acknowledgement of one's error and guilt - in this case it could have to do with overcoming one's negativity over another or even acknowledgement of the same. This poem speaks of one of the most common feelings humans feel on a day to day basis- hatred and anger. These feelings reverse the hour glass, set time back, throw us into sinking sand and keep our minds from evolving into a world of enlightenment ('the dove of peace lives beyond' If i'm always angry with you, how do i get past resentment?). The question is a pertinent one and the answer to it could save this world of a lot of our troubles. The poem speaks to me very personally...I have had situations where I've hated and situations where i've been hated. Gladly the light dawned. This was a very relevant poem, Dellena. I just wish I could get my ex-best friend to read this because he refuses to listen to anything I have to say. Well reflected. 'raindrop eyes'-- well said! Take care, Duane.

This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2005-06-03 20:53:21
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Dear Dellena, You've managed to capture a world of emotions in this poem. Hatred to me is the deepest emotion to tangle with. The question is intriquing: If I'm always angry with you how do I get past resentment? Yes, how indeed. Anger can build and store up in our hearts and minds, and forgiveness can seem out of reach. But, yet we are told to get past the anger, and to forgive is divine. What about forgetting? That to me is the hardest part of this emotion. Sometimes we just can not forget things that others do to us - and the very memory of hurt - can pop up at any given moment - making us hate again. How true the line, one can't exist without sun's light - to have light is to live and breathe. Will world's darkness ever persist? Another intriguing question, and I'm thinking yes, it will. All in all I've enjoyed this read - from beginning imagery to the end - Thanks for sharing. Sincerely, DeniMari

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