This Poem was Submitted By: Marcia McCaslin On Date: 2004-04-07 23:48:51 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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At The Full Of The Moon

Light slides from the day like blue satin being pulled by fingers beneath the horizon. Stars splash into place. An unstable moon rocks back and forth up the ridge like a rock cart wheel. It is full of itself and laughing at the earth. The mood catches on. The young feel old enough; The old feel young enough. Hormones dance around with urgency-- It could be now or never.

Copyright © April 2004 Marcia McCaslin

This Poem was Critiqued By: Jennifer j Hill On Date: 2004-05-07 17:37:01
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.84848
Hi Marcia, Another true blue gem. "Light slides from the day----This stanza is worded so beautifully! like blue satin being pulled by fingers beneath the horizon." It's making me have second thoughts about which of your lovelies to vote for. "Stars splash into place."----I'm getting wet from standing too close. "An unstable moon rocks----Awesome imagry! back and forth up the ridge like a rock cart wheel." "It is full of itself and----Yeah, I bet it is! laughing at the earth." "The mood catches on."----It's contageous "The young feel old enough;----So true!! The old feel young enough. Hormones dance around with urgency--" "It could be now or never."----In some cases we hope never. lol This is a fun one. Cute idea. I'm glad I didn't miss it. Blessings, Jennifer

This Poem was Critiqued By: Jordan Brendez Bandojo On Date: 2004-05-03 19:23:54
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.70732
Hi Marcia, The ending brings me a thrill: "Hormones dance around with urgency-- It could be now or never." Effective ending indeed! On the other hand, nice simile in the beginning. Allits and assonace are good highlights. Poetic devices, applied so cleverly! The imagery is splendid here! Now, I realize, at the full of the moon many great things happen! Thanks for sharing, Marcia. More of it! Jordan
This Poem was Critiqued By: Erzahl Leo M. Espino On Date: 2004-04-25 23:35:00
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.73333
Hi Marcia, I would say, this is one of your finest works that I have ever read! Not always the moon is “full” so when it does, it is really a wonder to view it in the vastness of the night sky. Not often I see a poem that would really capture that exotic and mysterious beauty of the full moon, and when I see or read one…my heart leaps like tidal waves in excitement. And yes, I have found one from your entry here. Reading your work from beginning to end, I was really drawn and mesmerized by your choice of words…intelligently done! “At The Full Of The Moon” – Great title, so lyrical! - Pardon me but this reminds me of my first early haiku entry “japanese verse 4 (Full Moon)”: “Majestic marble Quietly bares its beauty Tempting the still night” That is why I am very excited because it reminds me of my early work and one of my favorite haiku. Yes, “Full Moon” are one of those great subjects and very interesting one and your rendition here is one of my favorites. You have perfectly captured its essence. “Light slides from the day like blue satin being pulled by fingers beneath the horizon.” --- Your choice of words is perfect…the images are clear! --- Wow, wow, wow…this is haiku-like! “Stars splash into place.” --- Great formation! An unstable moon rocks back and forth up the ridge like a rock cart wheel. --- Hypnotizing! It is full of itself and laughing at the earth. --- I really liked this! It is so cartoonish! Especially those nights that the moon is full not only in “phase” but also by size, where yellow aura surrounding it adds its spell-binding beauty. The mood catches on. --- Great next line to support the last stanza. Yes, “mood” and “moon” goes along with each other. “The young feel old enough; The old feel young enough. Hormones dance around with urgency—“ --- And as they say…the normal become fools for a moment…this is fun! “It could be now or never.” --- Great ending! This is like a party! A festival of being yourself…of total freedom. I have been reading different poetries about moon and yours is a fresh perspective! It has its own style and beauty! Overall, I find your work skillfully done, lyrically impressive! Kudos! Thank you for sharing this one for our enjoyment! As always, Erzahl :)
This Poem was Critiqued By: Wayne R. Leach On Date: 2004-04-24 20:55:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.62857
Marcia, thanks for submitting this sensual and image-filled piece. It is a very pleasing read, even with the "moon rocking", or maybe because it is (possibly due to the motion of those seeing it)? :>) An unstable moon rocks back and forth up the ridge like a rock cart wheel. - [beautiful image and simile!] I see no problems in this, and simply adore the powerful closing stanza & punch line. (pun intended) Super submittal. Write on - in peace. Wayne
This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2004-04-10 22:42:38
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dear Marcia, This is really nice, your first verse being the best in my opinion with tremendous imagery - what a pretty picture your words make, to describe nightfall along with the splash of the stars. Very unique. Imagery stays good through the next verse, allowing the reader to catch on to the theme, but then it turns around and drifts off with a humourous ending, which completely took me by surprise, because I was expecting it to have as a serene ending as the beginning. Nice turn, and a nice write. DeniMari
This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Steven Scheffer On Date: 2004-04-09 01:44:43
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Marcia, Another winner. An inclination for metaphor; a sixth sense for rhythm and the tonal changes that keep a poem moving and alive; and, the untaught sense that poems are inverted pyramids balanced upon that little point of the last line . . . You got it, girl. Mark
This Poem was Critiqued By: Turner Lee Williams On Date: 2004-04-08 15:09:38
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Marcia--The title at first made me think the poem would be morbid like a Poe piece. I would have been just as happy, but glad to see the full moon get some positive play-smile. Great figurative language (simile;"Light slides from the day like blue satin being pulled by fingers beneath the horizon") start setting the stage for a sequence of picturesque (allits;"Stars splash..."/personification;"...moon rocks back and forth..."/simile;" a rock cart wheel") images that causes the intended warm stirring in the 'young and old' ("Hormones dance around with urgency--") The dashes at the end of the 6th stanza gives an emphatic pregnant pause (pun intended): taking a clear shot at amorous events ("It could be now or never"). Assorted line counts for the stanzas makes for an interesting arrangement and overall excellent read. Thanks for sharing this lightly fanciful effort. TLW
This Poem was Critiqued By: Mell W. Morris On Date: 2004-04-08 11:26:27
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Marcia: What a pleasure for me to be reviewing one of your poems again. And said poem is about the moon, a favorite entity and source of poetry. I like the free verse style and am curious about the changing of stanza length. There are three singular lines (for emphasis, I assume), one quatrain, two tercets, and one couplet. I am always curious about form and find poets usually do things very deliberately. The title fits and Stanza 1 gives us a simile that is quite lovely. "Light slides from the day like blue satin being pulled by fingers beneath the horizon." All the assonance with the long I sounds: light/slides/like/by/horizon...give a lilt like a song. Your simile is also quite fresh and unique as is the ensuing line: "Stars splash into place." "Place" slant rhymes back to "days" of S 1, continuing the euphony. You use personification with the stars splashing into the exact spot they need to be. Whimsical and appealing notion. "An unstable moon rocks back and forth up the ridge like a rock cart wheel." Another apposite simile albeit I am not sure I care for the news about the moon's instability. Seriously, yours is a good analogy and depicts the moon as undecided about where it will go tonight. Quite original, Marcia. "It is full of itself (and) laughing at the earth. The mood catches on." Again, total originality in writing that the moon is not only capricious but egotistical as well. Only you would come up wuth a metaphor of the moon as you have limned herein. "The young feel old enough; The old feel young enough. Hormones dance around with urgency-- It could be now or never." Delightful ending with the hormonal effects of the moon getting both the old and young into "the mood." I think I do remember hormonal urgency but it has been a while. Perhaps Wyoming moons have more power than Texas variety! I'm glad to read your romantic salute to Luna in lieu of all the bad press such as more domestic violence, criminal activity during her full phase. Your poem has the charm and appeal of the poetry you posted here in the good old days. I especially enjoyed this one. Kudos. Mell
This Poem was Critiqued By: Thomas Edward Wright On Date: 2004-04-08 05:45:45
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.53846
Light slides from [] day [] blue satin [] pulled by [use an interesting adj.] fingers beneath the horizon. Stars splash into place. An unstable moon rocks [] up the ridge [] a rock cart wheel. It is full of itself, and laugh[s] at [our?] earth. The mood catches on. The young feel old enough; The old feel young enough. Hormones dance around with urgency-- It could be now or [- It could be] never. some thoughts on your moon. tom
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