This Poem was Submitted By: Brandon Gene Petit On Date: 2006-04-12 03:54:44 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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The Utopist

Though Iíve felt the cream of winter dreams When the sun-scorched day is through My fingers wet is all I get And a glimpse of de jaí vu What a tragic waste, this aftertaste Gone away like morning dew But the pieces fit when the moon is lit And the stars are more than few A sly Earth sighs under twilight eyes Yielding wonders false and true Secrets took with the passing brook In a chilled ambrosial stew The spring is long and itíd seem quite wrong If the skies were forever blue Let the moonlight flow through the midnight snow And the flora dim its hue Let the cold air sting as a church bell rings And a sleeping world comes to While a brand new sway to the roles we play Makes inspiring tales ensue My cluttered head hasnít been misread And my heart knows what to do I explore my range for a graceful change As I wander roads anew

Copyright © April 2006 Brandon Gene Petit

Additional Notes:
Check out my new poetry collection "Intrinsic Desires." available at most online retailers, or order it from your local bookstore. ISBN: 1420891995


This Poem was Critiqued By: Jordan Brendez Bandojo On Date: 2006-04-18 00:26:53
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Brandon, It's been a long time since I critiqued your poetry and I am glad to have stumbled on this. I was intrigued about the title and I can only think of the word "perfectionist" to connote the idea. And the word/or phrase "de jaí vu" is new to me, of course, I searched for it. Anyways, you crafted this one with so much artistic lines like 'cream of winter dreams', 'chilled ambrosial stew', etc. And when I read this aloud, it makes a very good tone with all the alliterations and the like, it appears to be a song to me. More than anything else, this poem is a realization of what a person feel from season to season and good thing that there is hope in the mind to explore the graceful change. Thank you for sharing this with us! Jordan


This Poem was Critiqued By: Nancy Ann Hemsworth On Date: 2006-04-14 11:57:48
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.60000
This is lovely...the flow and rhyme pattern are wonderfully light and it sort of skips you through all the seasons and changes along the way..like a rock skipping the water. Enjoyed the personificaton throughout as well. gives the piece life as well.
This Poem was Critiqued By: marilyn terwilleger On Date: 2006-04-12 13:44:00
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 8.50000
Hi Brandon...this is a stunning poem and one that was a joy to read. They rhyme is so musical that I was sad when it ended. You have so many wonderful images here that it would be impossible for me to capture them all. Though Iíve felt the cream of winter dreams....this is fabulous to say the least When the sun-scorched day is through A sly Earth sighs under twilight eyes...I fell like tapping my foot when I read these lines and I don't know Yielding wonders false and true why I couldn't of thought of them A sly Earth sighs under twilight eyes...if I had to pick a favorite this would probably be it...but I can't be sure when there are so many phrases that sing to me My cluttered head hasnít been misread And my heart knows what to do I explore my range for a graceful change As I wander roads anew......this last stanza is the perfect ending to a perfect poem. Well done....barvo...Marilyn
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