This Poem was Submitted By: Thomas Edward Wright On Date: 2010-02-11 21:32:30 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Life's Sentence

for awhile it seemed easy. the words fell out and ran to the page, children breaking out of line for a chance to see the passing car carrying the Pope, the flock of blackbirds moving as one, weaving across the sky their tapestry of hope. the images were simple, honest, whole. Truth sat in the margins and nodded; I sat here believing the lies we told. children moving as one across the page, black verbs racing into a bridge abutment. the Pope breaking out of his Cadillac the children screaming for ice cream; me and you in a stairwell: cold, loud, deadly silent at three a.m.: without you I would have never had to leave this ugly old dog poem sitting at the back step where he bays at the big white moon. white nouns mount black verbs spreading rumors, inciting fear. having nothing more to say is where the end began rising like the sun where the stairwell at three a.m. was a dog baying at his moon. As the Pope prayed over the children who led the dog down the stairs into the light of a new dawn where a crowd awaited his homily near the bay, under the old moon under a black bird on a branch: It was as easy as catching my breath. It left and has never come back.

Copyright © February 2010 Thomas Edward Wright


This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Andrew Hislop On Date: 2010-03-06 03:51:19
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
TEW It always SEEMS easy. Twerp. MAH P.S. And this is an example of why it seems.


This Poem was Critiqued By: James C. Horak On Date: 2010-03-06 00:44:12
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
No, it didn't. JCH, the diabolical
This Poem was Critiqued By: cheyenne smyth On Date: 2010-02-21 15:56:52
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Tom, I can't remember how many times I have read this poem. I have several theories as to the meaning, the last one is, it could be about writing poetry, "with words fell out and ran to the page" and "white nouns mount black verbs" for example. Both of which are no doubt wrong. So now I believe what is more important than understanding the theme, is to enjoy the words. I do have a question about the second verse. You put caps on the word "Truth" and the only other place you did that is in the fifth verse and the word "as." The rest of the poem is written in lower case with the exception of the ending couplet. I am easily confused so please enlighten me. A great poem and one I admire. Best wishes, cheyenne
This Poem was Critiqued By: Rachel F. Spinoza On Date: 2010-02-18 20:57:55
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
I saw it on the corner of Tenth and Lemon. It asked for you. There was a dog too.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Duane J Jackson On Date: 2010-02-15 21:05:21
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Thomas, A deep poem with a strong social undercurrent - The church, the good and the bad, indocrination.....You seem liberated in the end and thats a good thing ! The poem, to me, started out in a very prose kind of way but with the flow and the richness in imagery (which show but never tell), I was all settled in for a good poetic read. Duane.
This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Steven Scheffer On Date: 2010-02-13 09:24:18
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Tom, The metaphorical richness is dazzling here. A formal feast: pun in the title; great metaphor of words as children moving over a page toward the pope (whose a great mysterious figure here); the dog poem paying at the moon . . . elaborate and rich. I'm not aware of anyone having an agenda against you and an eye toward structuring their vote so you don't win . . . so you should (in more ways than one) be ok with this. MSS
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