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This Poem was Submitted By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2010-10-12 16:01:40 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Passing Through

Are we here sent from "Heaven" to earth and become angels the moment of birth? When our mission or purpose of time is finished and all of our seeds have been sewn, does "God" call on our name to carry his angels back home? Through passing in peace of mortal flesh to death after living well. Will the "Kingdom of Heaven" be salvation with eternal preservation of spirits that rose and fell during a lifetime on earth by escaping hell?

Additional Notes:
Are we angels sent here by God, to return home, not as an angel but a spirit blessed to have passed on to eternal peace?

This Poem was Critiqued By: Tony P Spicuglia On Date: 2010-11-01 19:45:03
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
I can't say I have answers; outside of the scientific world. I understand faith and hope, but I also know my personal ignorance to the actual transition. I don't think we are angels, good or bad; but what do I know? I wonder what the alternatives might be. You don't really cover other options- and that might be a good thing. as for "escaping hell" - the concept is to derivative for me to get my arms around. Quantum mechanics is too difficult to tie down to make an assumption. I wonder, would a masochist enjoy eternity in hell?

This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2010-10-29 16:59:06
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Deni, I believe there is a God. Not of the earth made up stories God. But a force of goodness that we are apart of. That returns to him. One thing for sure we aren't as they tell us. View Zeitgeitz the movi and keep your mind open. [movie on line] And no I don't believe any kind of garbage, but research and see. I'm reading secret societies of the world right now. wow Chariots of the gods/gods of eden a couple other interesting. Keep searching/thinking/asking till you know! dellena

This Poem was Critiqued By: Duane J Jackson On Date: 2010-10-23 14:58:05
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Deni, I have to say...that you've done it again...this was tight and chiselled and though it was concise, the flow of this allowed all these amazing questions about the soul to seep in. Very well done! I liked the soft rhyme and the juxtaposed worlds of heaven, earth and hell and it all seems to come full circle. Apart from the poem, the additional notes distracted me. Your poem did the job well and I felt that there was nothing more that needed to be stated. I undertsand that this was probably a way of you wanting the reader to give your words a thought much after they exited the portals of tpl, but craft-wise...it was a distraction to the excellent piece :-) Excellent ! Duane.

This Poem was Critiqued By: cheyenne smyth On Date: 2010-10-15 01:23:04
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Deni, This is a thoughtful piece and one I enjoyed reading. I have a couple of suggestions. In your 8th line you should drop the word 'is' to the next line. Also you wrote...Does God call our name to...drop 'to' to the next line. This will make for a smoother enjambment. I don't know why you strayed from your format in the last six lines but perhaps you could use the same form througout. Having said that, I like the poem and the message. Best wishes, cheyenne

This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2010-10-14 19:40:24
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
I enjoyed your philosophical ideas in this poem, great stuff to ponder. I'm not sure that I care for the format as it tended to make your poem a bit choppy. Also, when coming to the end of a line you want the last word on that line to say something so try not to end them with it, to, and, etc., the point is an enjabment and punctuates your thoughts. Overall, I liked what you had to say and your choice of verbiage to say it...Lora

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