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This Poem was Submitted By: Latorial D. Faison On Date: 2005-05-12 20:59:59 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Chains of Command

You can get a lot of thinking done when there's time to do it. Today's headlines bombarded my thoughts: mistreatment of Iraqi prisoners, the Heinz papers released, the usual . . . Bush, Cheyney and Rumsfeld working co-herently to squash any thoughts of presidential impeachment ie. simultaneously making a fortune and saving their asses (smile). I'll tell you. I'm still trying to figure out why America would even allow anybody to be a Commander-in-Chief without having had a real military command in the U.S. Armed forces. White people are still doing the damndest things. They make the rules, disobey the rules, and then change the rules. It's the circle of life. Almost 3 years to the anniversary of 9/11, and still no justice for the terroristic slaughter that befell our nation. I'm about preached out on this one. Every preacher, pastor, philosopher and primary spokesperson seems to have the right idea, the right message, the right lead, the right reaction. I'm following my heart. I'm listening to the voices of the dead. And they tell me that both politics and religion are overrated. That's a shame, because it's what life offers to us all. It is what life has offered me. One day it stood before me with a Bible in one hand and a white man's world in the other. I'm still not sure whether I've chosen either hand without wanting to reap the benefits of the other. You call it human. I call it crazy. I call it confusing, mixed up, messed up . . . a damned shame. This is what we are made of, what we face each day we wake up, chains of command changing the command to chains for the man.

This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2005-06-06 13:03:52
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.85714
Dear Latorial, This is deep, and wonderfully stated, and the last verse, wraps up your poem perfectly. So many questions, no answers - we all are faced with the morose reality of our country, society and hands are tied. It seems to me corruption rules the roost, America this corporation is blindly going to get worse without a chance of getting better, and here we sit, the pions with no voice - to make sense of it all. Brilliant piece, I'm glad I read this one. DeniMari

This Poem was Critiqued By: Rachel F. Spinoza On Date: 2005-06-01 09:55:50
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Someone had to say it - glad that it was someone as articulate as you You can get a lot of thinking done when there's time to do it. Today's headlines bombarded my thoughts: [good suggestion of {bomb} in that line - subtle! mistreatment of Iraqi prisoners, the Heinz papers released, the usual . . . Bush, [Cheney [sp] and Rumsfeld the usual villains - yes.... but what about Condi? working co-herently to squash any thoughts of presidential impeachment ie. simultaneously making a fortune indeed and saving their asses (smile). I'll tell you. I'm still trying to figure out why America would even allow anybody to be a Commander-in-Chief without having had a real military command in the U.S. Armed forces. well, it can be done - Roosevelt was damn good - but the officers are usually not the ones who experienced the front lines. ALso I would hate to have a Patton in the White House. White people are still doing the damndest things. yep They make the rules, disobey the rules, and then change the rules. It's the circle of life. it can be changed though - we need to keep on them Almost 3 years to the anniversary of 9/11, and still no justice for the terroristic slaughter that befell our nation. I'm about no - but lots on innocent people have died in exploiting that tragedy - preached out on this one. Every preacher, pastor, philosopher and primary spokesperson seems to have the right idea, the right the right idea? I guess this is ironic - no? message, the right lead, the right reaction. I'm following my heart. I'm listening to the voices of the dead. And they tell me that both politics and religion are overrated. That's a shame, because it's what life offers to us all. It is what life has offered me. One day it stood before me with a Bible in one hand and a white man's world in the other. I'm still not sure whether I've chosen either hand without wanting to reap the benefits of the other. You call it human. I call it crazy. I call it confusing, mixed up, messed up . . . a damned shame. This is what we are made of, what we face each day we wake up, chains of command changing the command to chains for the man. like the alliterative ending and the message Best, Rachel

This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2005-05-17 01:31:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.90909
WOW Poet......so strong and powerful is this one.......I am going to share this one with my husband who will think it to be a well expressed poem filled with truth, honesty in thoughts...........good structure, word flow, images indeed........and those chains for the man are heavier with each passing day.....indeed a good write poet.......My heart goes out to those prisoners, not only in Iraqi but world wide.........from wars past and present......there are prisoners out there still.........you have named the three most prominent people involved with it all as well.........this week our newspapers announced the closing of most of the bases here in New England...............who will be left to protect our borders in the Northeast now and for what reason is the closing........money once more..........I say let them cut from some other sources and leave our bases alone......there will be more then 14,500 jobs affected by this move.........and the men and women serving will have to relocate as well.....again, causing more problems that these three men seem to enjoy making.......Thanks for posting and sharing with us once more....... God Bless, Claire

This Poem was Critiqued By: Mark Andrew Hislop On Date: 2005-05-15 13:19:43
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Dear Latorial I'm sure you've noticed that it's a white man's Bible, misappropriated from the Semites the white man now despises and bombs. It's a white man's world, misappropriated from those who could not afford to prevent the theft, most of whom could not afford to refuse the white man's bribe, most of whom are not ... ... white. Could you believe otherwise on the day you see a black Pope or POTUS? Only if you could believe his mind was not bleached white in order to accept the post. Mark.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Duane J Jackson On Date: 2005-05-14 06:50:40
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Latorial, This would have to be your best poem yet. This one is for the masses and I am especially drawn to pieces that have a political edge. You've captured the anger and discontentment of thousands and delivered it with venom. You've touched the sensitive core of governance, injustice and corruption. The imagery is stark and the language, rich. 'One day it stood before me with a Bible in one hand and a white man's world in the other. I'm still not sure whether I've chosen either' My favorite verse, this heightens a sense of confusion in the mind of the reader, especially at a time when religion and politics have such a very fine line between them. With the current dispensation, this line faces an even greater threat of vanishing completely. The voice of the poet seems to align with the voices of many a common man. Everyone who is someone (politicians, preacher, philosophers), seem to have an opinion but hardly anyone acts (lack of justice to the 9/11 victims). I'm not American but the poem transcends borders and touches the core of what is happening the world over. What is most impressive is the perfect balance you have sruck between the rawness of these 'street' issues with the finer art of writing good poetry ('I call it crazy. I call it confusing, mixed up, messed up . . . a damned shame.') Excellent job done!!! Now before I sign off there is just one contention. 'White people are still doing the damndest things'. Maybe, this is a greater generalisation than warranted. After all, the administration also has people like Condoleeza Rice and (had) Colin Powell in office. But, yes, I do perfectly understand that the minority african american community does have a lot of issues that need to be addressed. Good Job, again!!!! Take Care, Duane.

This Poem was Critiqued By: arnie s WACHMAN On Date: 2005-05-13 12:35:22
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 9.00000
Wow. This is certainly hard core journalism/thoughts/feelings expressed here. In the Commonwealth, and I'm from Canada as you know, our Prime Minister does not act as Chief of the military. Parliament does - big difference there - one person vs. Parliament. Who's system is better in that respect? (I won't answer that one). I do not know the "Heinz" system other than it's ketchup! I'm still trying to figure out why America would even allow anybody to be a Commander-in-Chief without having had a real military command in the U.S. Armed forces ......My answer to that is because there is/was no military connection, the Commander In Chief (President) can be more or less impartial. I think that's what your founding fathers had in mind! White people are still doing the damndest things. They make the rules, disobey the rules, and then change the rules. It's the circle of life..........I really really take exception to that statement. it's racist as far as I'm concerned. Don't you think Blacks do the same things? Look at most states in Africa...Zimbabwe, Zaire, Kenya where tribes go on rampant killing sprees. One day it stood before me with a Bible in one hand and a white man's world in the other. I'm still not sure whether I've chosen either ....again a racist remark. I am really really disappointed in you. You are painting us all with the same brush. Shame on you Latorial!

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