This Poem was Submitted By: Monica ONeill On Date: 2009-04-12 16:05:07 . . . Click Here To Mail this Poem to a Friend!

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Tale of the Bouncing Bunny

Whimsical, whistling bunny, Hippity hoppity down the road, Blindly rounded yonder curve And barely missed a toad. Alas, the toad, his fright undone Braced by fallen tree, Dusted off his spotted coat, “My, what big feet have thee!” Hippity hoppity down the road  The rabbit still bounced on, Soon approached a wooden bridge Spanning shallow pond. But, oh the bridge was old, Its planking far from new, The rabbit bounced halfway across And promptly fell right through. The toad arrived in time To see the rabbit sink Between the splintered railings And fall into the drink. The grinning toad, upon the bridge Looked down on soggy bunny, “Justice,” he thought, “is often sweet, But usually not this funny!”

Copyright © April 2009 Monica ONeill

Additional Notes:
Happy Easter...

This Poem was Critiqued By: Dellena Rovito On Date: 2009-05-02 17:10:02
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Monica, How good to hear from you. Cute Easter poem. You could write a childrens book. Rhyme was great, flowed easy. good job. Dellena Hope you are doing well.

This Poem was Critiqued By: Claire H. Currier On Date: 2009-04-23 23:30:21
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
I hope your Easter was a happy one too Monica. So nice to find your work once more and I do hope you will be sharing more in the days to come. A lovely tale of this bunny in great detail, allowing the reader to enjoy the journey and the justice of it all. As always well written, wonderful images created by the flow of your pen and I might add it would make a good little story for children to enjoy. Take good care, God Bless, Claire
This Poem was Critiqued By: Claus Michael Ranswill On Date: 2009-04-19 20:51:58
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Great poem, rhyme and story, this could easily be expanded into a children’s book, it flows, it tells a great story, it is creative, it rhymes with ease and is very visual, this could easily be an expanded children’s cartoon or short, keep up the good work, I see nothing bad with this, I look forward to others critique of this, how do you improve on greatness, the only other thing you could do is make it longer and give more adventures for us to read
This Poem was Critiqued By: James C. Horak On Date: 2009-04-18 15:56:07
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Quite a lark, Monica, I think you've found your poetry niche. You're ascribed with a long tradition of the poetry humorists, people like Don Marquis, Ogden Nash, even Lord Dunsany. Good company indeed. Timely, entertaining, and quite appropriate fare for the non-denominational at Easter. Kind of like the way I've enjoyed in the past sending my Jewish friends Christmas presents with all the trimmings. No, not, "usually (not) this funny!" though. Now don't let that bunny be mistaken for a basketball so long out of season, I might have to incorporate him into another Briar Patch Saga just when things are getting calm around here. See where infectuous humor can lead? My best, JCH
This Poem was Critiqued By: DeniMari Z. On Date: 2009-04-18 00:14:26
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Fantastic!! You know this could be put into a childrens book; and be entertaining to them and almost anyone who enjoys imagination; great rhyme and a story that sells itself outloud. Nothing is wrong in this poem - it's cute; original and flows completely free of pause from beginning to end. A lot of talent went in to this write - I'm happy I took the time to read it. Very enjoyable; blessings, Deni
This Poem was Critiqued By: Lora Silvey On Date: 2009-04-14 11:09:06
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 1.00000
Monica, So nice to see your post and what a delight your Easter poem is. It definitly put a smile on my face, thank you for such a nice gift. Best always, Lora
This Poem was Critiqued By: Duane J Jackson On Date: 2009-04-12 21:06:44
Critiquer Rating During Critique: 10.00000
Hi Monica, A nice one on the occassion of Easter. The piece had a good brisk pace to it in keeping with the hippity hoppity bunny :-) I like the use of imagery and keep it simple, yet engaging. Good to see a post from you. It has been quite some time. Duane.
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