madge B zaiko's E-Mail Address: madgezaiko@hotmail.com


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I write because I want to say something beautiful. Then again, sometimes I just have to write to save me from myself.

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Displaying Critiques 1 to 22 out of 22 Total Critiques.

Poem TitlePoet NameCritique Given by madge B zaikoCritique Date
As to the Site of the Preservation of MemoriesThomas Edward WrightA strong poem ... packed full of emotion!!! Thank you for sharing this desperate moment with us. I am blessed to have read it. Thank you -Madge2004-01-02 12:16:33
A Failure ToThomas Edward WrightWonderful poem Thomas!!!!!Again! The story is so clear and fasinating!There are so many facets to it! and wonderful images! The only thing I would look over is the line "whose red stains" it made me do a double take to understand what you meant there. Could I suggest maybe using "the inevitable blood Stained; Red." ? Just a thought. Thank you for sharing this!!!!Blessings!!!!!! -Madge2004-01-02 11:50:55
Country PumpkinClaire H. CurrierWhat a fun story!!!! I can almost hear your laugh in the background!!!!! My suggestion to you is to just comb through it again... there are some points that aren't as clear as others was the squirrell chasing him at one point? When did he turn on the hunter? Were they in the tub to begin with? It jumps from scene to scene and I am just losing touch of the progression... though, it was such fun to read regardless! Happy New Year!! Blessings -Madge2003-12-31 16:15:32
Mastering My IllusionsMichele Rae Mannwhat a beautiful image(as i see it) of the process to which you write? All the depths of the soul swirling into a melodious rhythmn that becomes your thoughts and emotion and finally your poem. Beautifully written!!!! I enjoyed this very much. Thank you and Happy new year! -Madge 2003-12-31 15:54:47
An Old Man's Song On Christmas EveRick BarnesWhat a lovely poem for the season! It is well put together; The rhythmn of the poem and clear and beautiful meaning. "the warmth of your touch does not require the touch of your hand" What a true statement... And one we should all remember as this busy world gets busier and our loved ones all live in different places and have a swarm of responciblity of their own... It's nice to know that all it takes is a warm thought! Blessings -Madge2003-12-26 11:01:57
Christmas in TexasMell W. MorrisHow fun! I can almost hear the fiddle in the background of this one... A little music, a little moonshine, and a very merry christmas! It makes me want to slap my knee. Thank you for sharing!!! Blessings -Madge2003-12-23 00:30:22
ANGELhousam majid jarraran interesting poem... I almost feel as though it is two separate poems... That the first should end at the line "angels only come for what they're asked for, be it love be it dreams." And another start directly after... I say this because there is different energies that come across in the second half of it. I don't feel as if it flows naturally into it... Otherwise, i enjoyed the poem! Blessings -Madge 2003-12-23 00:22:31
GobletC ArrownutAh yes!!! how well I can relate to this!!!!! I get sick going into any shopping area... Sick because of the very reasons you discribe in your poem. "crashing through the merry air of christmas"... How blinded we all can be by greed. Thank you for this!!! Blessings -Madge2003-12-21 00:33:13
Me and I changed to YouMichele Rae MannInteresting! I am curious as to if this is a continuation of your other poem... or a revision? In either case I think that this would go well side by side.. Almost as an epic. How quickly we want to bring a "you" into Meand I... How easily it is to try and encorporate a life into our own and free us from the monotony of Me and I... and yet, how hard it can be. thank you for your poem! Blessings -Madge2003-12-21 00:30:32
Boxes - revisitedMichele Rae MannDefinately more concise and clear in your images!! I really like what you've changed. Blessings -Madge2003-12-21 00:25:41
I and MeMichele Rae MannI feel the emotion that you have put into this poem from the first line..." Why do I cry where you do not see?" I really like that. I hope that you funnel more of that emotion through your poetry because that's the stuff that makes the words beautiful... My suggestion with this poem is to tone down the rhyming a little bit... I was stuck on the rhymes too much... perhaps, if you add some lines with contrasting rhythmn? Good luck -Madge2003-12-18 16:06:31
Rural ShindigJordan Brendez BandojoWhat a piece of worK! It rolls off your tongue like chocolate bubbles... Very detailed, very much like a masked dance. Hidden behind the costume of words lies a spectator drunk in images almost laughing with each line. I really think this is fun! The only thing that confused me was the line"Frolic wham reverberated" I am not really clear on it's meaning. Thank you for the great imagery. Blessings -Madge2003-12-16 01:32:16
POPRobert L TremblayMY GOODNESS!!!! I am dizzy with the explaination of the poem... It reminds me of modern art... I don't quite understand what it is until it's explained to me. So then, it is your explaination that is the true art ... not the piece itself...The endeavor and dedication to saying this and doing this is YOUR real ART. And, it's delightful to have been one of your witnesses. BLessings -madge2003-12-16 01:23:09
cleansingSandra J KelleyIt sounds as though it was you who did these things... So, detailed...Each moment is caught with your words and imagery...I am curious as to why she was ripping out pages... What needed to be cleansed... It leaves me very curious... Definately an interesting poem! I enjoyed reading it! Thank you. Blessings -Madge2003-12-16 01:14:14
First, Last KissRobert L TremblayAH! A familiar story... I feel for you my friend. I really liked this... My critique would be for you to maybe try and keep the rhythmn up that you have in the first stanza throughout the peice... It is very tight and easy to feel and read... it loosens up as the poem goes along. I am amazed at the time you put into these poems ... It reminds me ,loosely, of a great artist ( Chuck Close ). Blessings -Madge 2003-12-13 01:19:21
MAN-HATERApril Rose Ochinang ClaessensApril!! I truly enjoyed this poem!!!! I would take another look at the ending though... I feel like the beginning is so detailed and such a clear and powerful story... Then it abruptly changes. My suggestion would be to continue with the detail and make it a longer peice or shorten it. Or perhaps even to keep the beginning for the end of the poem... because that is the real powerhouse of the peice. Beautiful poem!!!!! Blessings -Madge2003-12-13 01:06:52
BoxesMichele Rae Mann I feel as though the poem has a very strong message that is lost in the vagueness of the ideas... Meaning... I think you are dancing around an idea but not really hitting it on the head. I wouldn't be afraid to add a little bit more to the poem. I envision dreams some that could be lost And others to be not... I don't understand this line "Others to be not.." I hope you do more with this poem cause I truly like the idea of endless boxes... Blessings -Madge 2003-12-11 00:11:09
The Murder of Emily DickensonC ArrownutThere are such gems in this peice!!!! "I slowly waited--the mind knows no haste-- and I had put away my pain and my sorrow too for civility’s sake." It sets her character in a beautiful way... I feel as though there are peices missing though in the poem.. I don't quite understand the journey of the poem as well as I would like too... I almost feel that she's writing a letter for her psychologist or her lover? Then she seems to be walking down streets in her past- but why is she telling this to whomever she is writing? I love the ending too saying that writing is her only recovery .. Etc. But, I am still not sure what exactly she's recovering from? Her attempted suicide? I would definately add more to this poem... It could be so beautiful!! Blessings -Madge 2003-12-10 23:35:11
The FileC ArrownutI LOVE IT! Sorry that I am not more specific with you than that... but, it's refreshingly clear, unique, and the rhythmn is a lot of fun. Can't wait to read more of your work! 2003-12-04 23:56:30
What you gave up and Desire (two poems)Kimberly A ButterworthInteresting use of punctuation. I found it kind of distracting... Though, maybe, it was the lumious rhythmn of the mind overwrought with questions and answers at the same time? (in the first poem) The second one it felt more like an Activist's march with very strong ideas of how you should deal with your desire. It was like a montra almost with the punctuation. Which I think worked, if that's what you're going for in the second poem, but not so much in the first one- which seemed as though it should be a little more fluid. I am curious to read more of your poetry, as your style is very different from mine and probably one I can learn from. 2003-12-04 23:50:01
Changing of the SatansC ArrownutI definately like this piece! I feel like there was more you wanted to say with it though at the end? It feels almost abrupt in comparison to the detailed begining. My critique would be to try and even that abruptness out or if that is a choice, then to make it more pronounced. Very interesting idea though!! I love the image of the fight. 2003-12-04 23:35:34
Joe T's Pub and BillardsRobert L TremblaySome of the images were lovely. I think perhaps you should avoid using so many in one poem though. I was dizzzy with these images that seem to jump around a bit. I would love to explore each idea separately. " On fair maiden, Barb or Kim, whatever Somehow, Someday I will love forever..." God I love those lines!!!!2003-12-04 23:27:56
Poem TitlePoet NameCritique Given by madge B zaikoCritique Date

Displaying Critiques 1 to 22 out of 22 Total Critiques.

If you would like to view all of madge B zaiko's Poetry just Click Here.

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